Kinda Emo Todae~

Well, i have no choice but to blog into my phoen 1st.. why? Cause recently , my memory is liek deteriotating, cant seem to remember wad happen durign the day.. Maybe this is wad happens when a person has too much worries and stress? Hmm.. thats why you can see that it took me quite some time to blog.. I cant seem to remember anythign the day before.. Ytd i forced myself to recall, then onli i am able to rmb.. Well.. Practically im late again... had to be late.. every morning when i woke up, my eyes would swell.. so.. had to give it some time before i head down to my mom's stall.. or many qns would be asked.. you know wad i mean..

Hmm.. it seems like Chris already knwo dat i liked him.. And at dat time, when he told me that he already know, i totally froze.. didn't know wad to do or to say.. Darn stressed, darn confused.. See la.. have to blog early , den wad happens after dat have to write in today's post.. Anyway, it seems like im the one avoiding it instead of him.. wad is wrogn with me?.. my gawd.. Oh well.. since he already knew, its up to him to decide.. not me.. Anyway, he said he wanna be single forever.. so there's nothign i can do right? Hais.. being darn emo again.. Dots...

Well, i got scolded by my mom for reachign late.. my mom had to rush to do her things, so she can gt more slp in the noon.. she said she slept late ytd.. Me, dunno wad is happening to me, was in a daze the whole day and ended up gettingscolded again.. wad is wrong with me?!?!! i cried when love songs were being played on the radio.. my mom was doing the dishes..so, thank god she didn't saw me crying.. No mood to eat.. i onli know i want to find a corner and cry till im all dried up.. so no more tears would come out.. Hais.. ok.. Im officially immune to pain.. i wonder why.. in the afternoon, when i finished serving, there would be mugs that have to be cleared to the pail and were all piping hot, cuz juz took out from the steamer.. i simply used my hads to hold it instead of usign the cloth.. even my mom said im crazy.. didn't talk much today.. whoever talk to me , i juz smiled to them and i looked away .. i wonder wad would become of me if it continues.. Hais.. Wanted to buy a cig but i held back.. temptations were high so i ended up burning my fingers to stop myself.. because he dun like ppl to smoke..

hmm.. there are actualyl many weird ppl around.. like ytd, 1 customer asked for black chicken soup.. in the end she said i nv order black chicken soup den say dun wan the soup.. den walk away.... den today.. laggi worse.. come to our stall asking for "Burbur Hitam" (black glutinous rice being sold at desert shops).. funnt right? or they have no brains.. Anyway, feeling much better now cuz i was being lame-ed by my mom's fren.. he darn lame can?till i laugh lor.. keep on repeatedly saying im veri weird today etc etc..den forget wad he say lial.. den i laugh.. dotz...

I was allowed to go home early.. can you believe it? for no reason sia.. maybe mummy know im in a bad mood today.. cuz today when she talked to me, i totally didn;t reply her or "huh? wad you say?" in a daze ma.. wad you expect.? Skipped breakfast and lunch today.. no mood.. ate a little for dinner.. actualyl wanted to eat in the afternoon , but when i wanna take a bowl of rice, no mood sia.. though im super hungry..1st time hearing me.. not eating when there are food infront of me.. Im getting tired.. veri veri tired and dried up.. i cant cry anymore.. my eyes are all swelled up.. im really veri tired of all these.. i really wanna juz slp and don wake up.. like dis i wont have to suffer anymore..hais.. Life Sucks.. guess the fortune teller is right.. everything i do dis year would be a failure.. so.. wads the point? suffer for a year??

Anyway, met up with kenny after work.. in the end still bought a pack of cigs, and guess wad? now left with half a pack.. which is super unusual for me.. usually is 1 day like still new pack.. but now.. half pack.. hais.. Yr.. you are right.. all i can do now is to wait.. maybe tml would be better.. tml would always be a better day.. i heard from Super Mario from Power98.. he said a phrase "Don't Waste Your Time On A Person Who Rejected You" when i heard dis phrase i cried again.. am i hopeless? i think im on the brink of insanity.. hais.. oh well. im veri tired.. gonna get some slp.. not gonna intro any places to eat.. no mood.. ok.. cla0x..

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